The News of Today is the History of Tomorrow
Correction: As always here we run corrections first and do not hide them. Yesterday I said that Randy Hillier, who called for a vote of no confidence against Canadian Prime Minister Justa Turd-o, was a Member of Parliament. He is a member of the Provincial Parliament, akin to a U.S. state legislator. Thanks to “Freeper” gymbeau for the correction.
IN POLITICAL NEWS
1) Over 2,000 ballot “mules” have been caught by security camera and cell phone GPS footage stuffing ballot boxes.
-Not a peep from the “fine people” at the DOJ or FBI. They are too busy trying to infiltrate conservative rallies looking like Nazis.
2) . . . while Arizona state senators are hearing evidence that close to 10,000 phony ballots came in with “95% [going] to one candidate.”
-Crickets from the “fine people” at the FBI. No action from Arizona Attorney General Mark Byrnovich.
3) After a meeting with governors, the Demented Pervert was supposed to take questions from the press when his handlers herded him out.
4) For one of the first times since becoming president, the Rutabaga actually mentioned border security saying “There’s a whole lot of illegal . . . um, um, movement, but, ah, there’s also a way to be to deal with the reason they’re leaving in the first place.”
-You know, Rutabaga, it’s actually easier to build a wall than to fix a half-dozen countries over which you have zero control.
5) Now half of all Americans support impeaching the Rutabaga.
6) Where is Veeta Vita Vindman when you need him? Biteme’s Perfect Call, Part II
7) The corruption and inanity of this administration continues to marvel: Biteme’s nominee to be the top banking regulator requested the unmasking of Michael Flynn in 2016.
8) File under: “Of course they will!” Kollyfornia will pause its China Virus rules for the Super Bowl, having closed most businesses since 2000.
9) Yet even in Kollyfornia, some lawmakers are starting to wake up to the gross criminality and unsustainability of their government as the state’s universal health care bill dies due to lack of votes.
10) Also in Kollyfornia, a firefighter, Captain Vical “Max” Fortuna was killed while battling a dumpster fire.
11) Meanwhile, in New Beruit—otherwise known as Seattle—activists admire the “boldness” of shoplifting and say it’s justified.
12) Speaking of crime, all U.S. federal prisons went into lockdown after a deadly gang fight.
-A call has been put into Jeremy Renner, the Mayor of Kingstown, to negotiate peace among the prison gangs.
13) . . . while a massive brawl broke out in a Bensalem, Pennsylvania Golden Corral after the buffet ran out of steak.
-Never, ever mess with a man’s meat...
14) When you’ve lost Naomi Wolf: liberal author writes of the “elite global technocrat class and their distance from the people whose lives they may crush,” calling the current totalitarianism “Satanic” and “evil.”
15) Given the horrors of the China Virus and its vaxxes, we like to celebrate real medical breakthroughs here at Today’s News so a new treatment of osteoarthritis has been found to reverse the condition.
16) Caught red-handed (literally): 23 former U.S. Senators and Congressmen have lobbied for either ChiCom military or ChiCom-linked companies.
-There was a time when such people would meet a fate that we are not permitted to discuss here.
17) A lot of crime news today. The driver in a “mass casualty” North Las Vegas (i.e., New Babylon) crash that killed nine people including himself had a long criminal history dating to the 1990s.
18) Meanwhile, the “defund police” members of the Squad are the biggest spenders of all on private security.
-Ever see “13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi” when the Libyan so-called “private security” forces run from the terrorists. Yeah. That’s what I’m talkin’ about.
IN ECONOMIC NEWS
19) Soaring fertilizer costs may drive food costs ten times higher and spark global famines. Cereal output alone is forecast to reduce food production for 100 million people.
20) Tesla is recalling 54,000 cars and SUVs because their “Full Self-Driving” software lets them run stop signs.
-Wait, that’s illegal? I thought they were just suggestions.
21) Inflation coming for your closet, as cotton costs, supply chain disruptions portend 10% increase.
IN INTERNATIONAL NEWS
22) Facing a raft of agreements with Asian nations, the Biteme administration has yet to explain its plans as officials admit, gee, they haven’t actually come up with any plans for China.
23) Canadian health officials are hinting at ending the nation’s China Virus restrictions—but not because of the truckers.
-Oooooh nooooo. Certainly not because there is no food transportation nationwide. Nah.
24) It was only a matter of time: a transoid woman identifies as a wolf and is “spiritually” an animal.
25) The world’s longest lightning bolt that lasted for over eight seconds and traversed 477 miles was seen in Texas, Louisiana, and Mississippi.
-Pastors suggest God is warming up for the West Coast.
IN ENTERTAINMENT NEWS
26) Joe Rogan, who had Spotify by its digital testicles, has made an enormous error and apologized. Now he will have hell to pay.
-It must have been when the latest raft of big names threatened to leave Spotify, including Slim Whitman, Zamphir, Billy Ray Cyrus, and Yoko Ono.
27) And more apologies: that international authority on the Holocaust, Whoopi Goldberg, said the Holocaust wasn’t about race,” contrary to Adolf Hitler’s insistence that it was. She now says it’s about both race and man’s inhumanity to man.”
-Transoid women to pounce in 3 . . . 2 . . . 1 . . .
28) Dwarf actors slam Peter Dinklage for taking away “dream roles” for little people by criticizing Disney’s “Snow White” remake. “I can’t play Superman or Captain America,” laments Dinklage.
-Nor can you play a Space Shuttle or a loaf of bread. So?
IN CHINA VIRUS NEWS
29) In New York (aka, New Kabul) unvaxxed NYPD officers were given a new February deadline to get their poison.
30) Bad news for Lockdown Lenins: in a new poll 70% (that’s more than two-thirds if you aren’t homeschooling) say it's time to accept the China Virus and move on with our lives.
31) A “meta-analysis” by Johns Hopkins University finds “lockdowns have had little to no public health effects, they have imposed enormous economic and social costs . . . lockdown policies are ill-founded & should be rejected as a pandemic policy instrument.”
-As we have said for over a year.
32) South Africa now joins the list of nations done with the China Virus restrictions.
33) . . . as is the city of Denver, which drops maskie and vax mandates.
34) The once-fine company Hershey has fired its unvaxxed employees.
35) Now Whackadoodle Leftists (WLs) are saying that the lockdowns were merely so “right-wing” groups could take over school boards.
-The mental illness in this country by WLs is astronomical in scope.
36) And finally, sometime in the future there will be statues to such people: A Sarasota nurse practitioner saved all but one of 1,092 patients she treated for the China Virus with ivermectin and the FLCCC protocols . . . and not a single vax.